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What can you do if you’ve somehow lost your confidence? You have big dreams and goals but no longer have faith in yourself and your abilities to achieve. You know there’s a wealth of science behind the idea that you are completely in charge of your own success, but somehow you’ve started thinking you’re not capable of doing what it takes. I’m talking to myself here because I’ve been there and done that. So what to do?
First realize this is not unusual. There is nothing wrong with you. Life happens. You get whacked and battered. You meet and deal with people who neither share your values nor demonstrate the integrity you value.
There is little you can do about those things. Somehow you have attracted them into your life. Just let them go. You can do that. What you forget atrophies in the same manner as that which you dwell upon grows. Focus your mind on what you want to be and to experience.
Remember you are the same person who confidently faced life in the past and had success. You have not changed. Only your perception of self has become misaligned with the truth. So start by thinking of each new day as the first step on a new adventure.
Adventures, by their very nature, can be a bit scary. Stepping into the unknown is always a little scary. So be prepared.
Plan your days in simple steps. Write them down. Do exactly what you said you’d do and check off each simple accomplishment as you complete it.
Start to retrain your brain. Get yourself a 3×5 index card and write “I Promise to” at the top and “I always keep my promises” at the bottom. Then write out a simple chore or task that you promise to accomplish by week’s end; something simple like “Cut the grass by May 13”.
Now read that card and what you promised to do out loud at least twice per day, even after you’ve done what you said you’d do. Be sure to read “I always keep my promises” as well as the promise. Celebrate when you’ve done what you promised.
Now repeat the process with a new task for the upcoming week. Read that card as before, including the promise already kept, celebrating that success each time. Check off the new task when done and at the end of the week celebrate that new success and add another thing you promise yourself you will accomplish.
When your first card is full, begin another. Put the last two or three tasks from the first card at the top of the new one and add a new promise. Read the card as before. Make this a habit and you’ll be amazed at how it can change your perspective.
But be warned. Do not promise to do something and then fail to do it. No circumstance or excuse you make to yourself can fool your subconscious mind. It knows what you truly know and believe. No matter how trivial the task, a promise broken leaves an indelible mark. The subconscious has no conception of size. There is absolutely no way you can deceive your true self.
We all have a tendency to dwell upon the past. Unfortunately we also have a penchant for dwelling upon what we think are failure, injustices and things we’d rather forget. This simply adds fuel to the fire of buring away at our confidence and faith in ourselves. So here’ another simple exercise to flip that situation on its head.
Each day just before heading to bed, grab another index card and jot down something for which you are grateful, or some recollection of an accomplishment of which you are proud. It could be a short note about a time when you felt joy, happiness or love. Just focus on the things that made you feel great that day, last week or even years ago.
You’ll soon have a stacks of these cards. Periodically flip through them and read the notes you’ve made aloud. Savour the moments and the feelings they conjure within you. Flip through the cards daily and whenever you feel the need form positive reinforcement or a “feel good” moment..
Just keep writing and reading these cards. Let your pride in your accomplishments flood your mind. Let the knowledge that you have much for which to be grateful flood your heart.
Self confidence begins with self trust. Knowing you have accomplished much and have the integrity to keep your promises, starting with those you make to yourself, will go far in reestablishing your confidence and faith in yourself.
But you must develop persistence which is more a habit than a personality trait.
Internet and network marketer from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. Specializing in online affiliate marketing, SEO and video marketing. Network and online marketing training, health and wellness and growing wealth for me and my team are where I focus my efforts.
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